Reviews by JayNahNah
Summary:

Edward convinces Bella, his Honors Bio lab partner to help him with an extra credit project that will help him with his med-school aspirations.  Agreeing, she soon finds her time taken over by her gorgeous and ambitious classmate. AH/AU/CANNON/OOC Winner of Honorable Mention for tying 4th Place in Twi-High Anonymous One-Shot Contest!

 

 

ECW


Categories: Twilight, Canon Pairings, All Human, Alternate Universe
Characters: Bella/Edward
Genre: None
Language: None
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 8049 Read Count: 804
[Report This] Published: 01 Mar 2010 Updated: 01 Mar 2010
Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 02 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 1: First Weekends at First Beach

Sweet!  Looking forward to more!



Author's Response:

This is my first hs story so I'm excited to run with it...thanks for the reviews!

Friends in Love by AgoodWITCH Rated: NC-17 starstarstarstarstar [Reviews - 179]
Summary:

Edward Cullen is desperate to move out of his apartment with Alice and lands in the only campus housing available, a co-ed apartment with Bella Swan. Both have feelings for the other but are unable to voice them and find themselves in separate relationships. As the friendship grows in spite of deeper feelings trouble brews and Edward finds himself being pushed to his limits while Bella deals with some of her issues. So what can you do when you love your friend...read to find out! Be warned that this story deals with the subject rape and abuse.

 

FriendsinLove

Banner by IllicitWriter

 

twilight1


Categories: Twilight, Canon Pairings, All Human
Characters: Bella/Edward
Genre: None
Language: None
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: Amberina's Completed Favs List, Lilyellacullens want to read list!
Chapters: 23 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 119515 Read Count: 36671
[Report This] Published: 01 Mar 2010 Updated: 11 Jun 2011
Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 02 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 2: React now, think later

Nice beginning chapters.  Looking forward to see how it goes.



Author's Response:

Thanks this story gets really interesting so I can't wait to see what you think!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 06 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 11: Whispers, Fears and Baby Steps

I loved it and hope TWCS is up and running.  I'll refavorite my stories since I wasn't getting update notices.



Author's Response:

Well with 7-9, I didn't delete and add new chapters, I edited it and dropped the text into the empty story text box, so you wouldn't get an email.  Thanks for the continued love!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 05 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 5: Breaking Point

Thank you for not drawing out the "does he, does she", "will she, will", etc.

I really hope Bella does not draw out the Jake break thing....just refuse to see him, tell him it's over and if he persists, report his a$$.

Also glad Tanya "womaned" up and told Edward straight.  Maybe she was wanting him to deny it and commit to her but it seems that they were never boyfriend/girlfriend but more like friends with benefits.  Same with Jake & Bella except I think she got roped into it and didn't know how to stop it...hopefully, until now! 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 05 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 6: Everything Falls Apart

Another fantastic chapter.  So glad Bella told the truth and Edward got there in time!

Looking forward to more!



Author's Response:

Awe...this was a hard one to write and having Edward see it was important because if she wouldn't to tell to protect herself, leaving Jake free would put Edward in risk too and Bella would never do that!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 05 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 7: Returning to the Scene of the Crime

I love how frequently update....

Great story...would have liked a bit more insight into what Edward was feeling when Bella came home.

Please don't be offended but it felt that EPOV & BPOV were a bit too similiar.

Really good and looking forward to more!



Author's Response:

This part of the story is already written and now I'm just editing it, so its coming quick...you guys have been nicely asking for more so I;m pushing thru.  In that chapter in particular I was having problems with Edward's voice, mainly becasue he was so emotional.  No offense taken.  Hoping to get one more out tonight before bed ;}

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 05 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 8: Understanding Nila's Reasons

Thanks for the QUICK update!!  Nice movement and glad the therapist is using unusual techniques with Bella.

I think Edward was trying to tell Bella how he is feeling but Bella being Bella, doesn't see it but that's okay as it's still new!



Author's Response:

Thanks...things will come out soon enough!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 05 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 9: Slip of the Tongue

You're the best. As soon as I finish a chapter, I get a new update alert.
Love the sweet kiss... Just what they needed.

Author's Response:

Well, I hope you don't hate me once I catch up and the updates come slower...that sweet kiss was so fun to write, I'm excited about where it goes from here!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 06 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 10: A Shadow of a Ghost

Thanks for responding to my earlier comment.  If not, I wouldn't have known you had updated this story.

Didn't know there was a failure....I'll have to refavorite this story so I get the updates...I'm a few behind.

Great chapter by the way....There is something about these characters that really speak to the readers. or at least to me.



Author's Response:

Thanks...this story did okay on ffn, but was always overshadowed by DwM because people really liked it.  Now people still love that here, but this story has found quite a following over here and it makes me so proud becuase you all are so passionaet about these characters and their problems which is why I wrote it, to bring awareness using the characters we love.  Thanks again!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 06 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 1: Better Than Expected

Oh,okay....in any case, glad I checked 'cause I would have been upset to have missed some new chapters.



Author's Response:

Don't worry, you would have noticed when you saw the chapter titles and been all like "where'd these come from?"

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 07 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 12: Strength in Numbers

Wow...cannot imagine what Bella is going through.

Dickless of her Dad to cut her allowance in half.  Communication is key and cannot believe Renee would agree.

Dysfunctional



Author's Response:

Bella's got a lot on her plate and Charlie is trying to foce a conversation by forcing her hand and Renee is ggoi along because she's upset t the silent treatment too!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 21 Sep 2010 Title: Chapter 14: Confidence Found

Worth the wait so no worries. Their "first" time seemed a little rushed & glossed over but it was sexy!

Author's Response:

thank you. My limes are always quicker than my lemons are, I don't feel as comfortable writing them...

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 07 Dec 2010 Title: Chapter 15: Going "Home"

Thank you....glad Bella has Edward as her parents aren't there for her.

Author's Response:

Yeah, its a sad thing to write, but she really had to be 'alone' in this next part. thanks for the review, as always!

 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 24 May 2011 Title: Chapter 17: Lest Terror Be Forgotten

Very powerful.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 01 Jun 2011 Title: Chapter 18: Terror Comes Home

Awesome!! Too bad they couldn't tell the jury what Paul did! Just another nail in the coffin!!
Great job!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 11 Jun 2011 Title: Chapter 23: Epilogue 2: A Little Piece of Happily Ever After

Very powerful! You did a great job dealing with an uncomfortable but more common crime than we'd like to believe.
Just because the perpetrator is locked up doesn't mean it's over.
Thank you for being open and graphic because sugar coating doesn't he,o,
Great job!!

Author's Response:

Thank you for understanding my need to tell this the way I did...I've watched this crime destroy lives and only by putting it out there will we be able to make it okay to talk about it.  You've supported me thru the past two years and every review makes me smile.

Summary:

banner

 

Bella Swan gets a job as a personal assistant to the "The Sexiest Man Alive" Edward Masen while attending USC.  Sparks fly between her much older boss and her, but they soon find that temptation is too hard to fight.

 

It's a coming of age story with Bella, who learns to embrace herself as well as the life she's found herself thrown into, and a little Britward on the side.

 

*WARNING:  Rated NC-17 for language, lemons, and adult sit.*


Categories: Canon Pairings, Twilight
Characters: Bella/Edward
Genre: None
Language: None
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: Ageise02's not read yet, My All-Time Favorites, I Whitlock's read , Amberina's Completed Favs List, G8or Favor8s Read, Kuu Faves, My Favorite Stories, Brooklyn - to read, My favs past present and future , TBR
Chapters: 46 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 298638 Read Count: 143766
[Report This] Published: 15 Mar 2010 Updated: 15 Dec 2010
Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 15 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

I thought this would be too similiar to another FF story but it's not.  Movie star and PA but that's where it ends.

I like it!!!!



Author's Response:

Help Wanted????  That's the only one I know out there that's similar at first glance.  Of course, I don't get to read ff too often...

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 15 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 2

Really, Really Good!!!  Your Edward reminds me of George Clooney-esque (though not as old) and the young Bella.  He's very aware of the attraction but because of his age and experience, is able to keep his distance and his control a bit better.  When he can't, oh boy!!!

I'm looking forward to your updates!



Author's Response:

Haha, George Clooney from his ER days is exactly how I picture Edward.  Thanks for the reviews!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 15 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 3: Chapter 3

Wow, again!!!

I'm a sucker for UST!!!

 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 15 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Yes - but in HW - the characters were closer in age and that Edward had mucho problems when he was younger, trauma, drama, etc.  That Bella was innocent but not as much like your B.

I know I'm going to enjoy this one as well!



Author's Response:

Sounds similar to an Edward I'm developing for my next fic.  Definitely will NOT be reading that so I don't get any outside influence, lol.

Thanks!  I have a lot of fun with this one...

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 03 Dec 2010 Title: Chapter 45: Chapter 45

What?? Last chapter?
*sad face*
Great story!! Loved it from beginning to end!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 20 Oct 2010 Title: Chapter 39: Chapter 39

Very good.  I believe you will get to all the unanswered questions in due time.  I appreciate Charlie explaining the investigation into the crash.  When I first read it, it reminded me of Princess Diana and how the papparazzi swarm celebrities for "the money shot" and how they don't realize how dangerous it is for all involved and even the innocent bystander.  Stricter laws and harsher penalties should be made.  I get that "everyone has the right to make a living" but there needs to be restrictions as well....okay, off my rant.

I'm a bit worried about how Bella "will never be the same"...but am semi comforted that Alice has "seen" that everything will be okay.  I would hate for Bella to me paralyzed, suffer from amnesia or something along those lines.  A long recovery is apparent but I'm hoping by the end, all will be okay.  I have no doubt that Edward will be with her no matter what but I would hate to have more issues or obstacles to overcome so early in their marriage.

Again, great chapter and very realistic in your portrayal of Edward and his state of mind.

 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 28 Oct 2010 Title: Chapter 40: Chapter 40

Great chapter. Rebuilt pelvis?? Does that mean no mini eddies??

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 10 Nov 2010 Title: Chapter 42: Chapter 42

So sad no NY. Praying for continued improvement. Great job!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 17 Nov 2010 Title: Chapter 43: Chapter 43

Finally!!  I was ready to come over to fanfic land and knock some solid sense into Bella's brain.  I know she doesn't think she's enough because, damn...he's Edward Fricken Cullen but she's enough for him and that's all that matters!

Hoping for the best....

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 25 Nov 2010 Title: Chapter 44: Chapter 44

Great one! So happy to see them back on track!

Summary:

Edward and Bella are both divorced. Seeing and flirting with each other everyday while dropping their kids off at school finally results into a wonderful night together. Language/Lemons Please read & review. The one shot that inspired A Long Way to Go.


Categories: Canon Pairings, Twilight
Characters: Bella/Edward
Genre: None
Language: None
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: Love to drive's Stories to read
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 13883 Read Count: 723
[Report This] Published: 19 Mar 2010 Updated: 19 Mar 2010
Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 20 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 1: A Little Flirting Goes A Long Way

Good beginning....seriously think you should post chapters.  Would like to see how it evolves.



Author's Response:

Thank you for reading my story and taking the time to review. Thank you for the interest and saying it has a good beginning. I will post the first chapter of the story next week. It is a work in progress, so please be patient. The name is A Long Way to Go.

Thanks again,

freakybella

Summary:

Bella thinks she has her life figured out. She has the best father and brother but all too soon her life comes shattering down around her. Will Edward be able to help her? E/B, Em/R, J/A AH & NC-17 for lemons.

Banner by Mkystich

b


Categories: Canon Pairings, Twilight, All Human
Characters: Bella/Edward
Genre: None
Language: None
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: Ageise02's Read Stories, To Read, Stories I've Already read, My Favorite Stories, luv2write finished reads, to read
Chapters: 70 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 156928 Read Count: 119997
[Report This] Published: 01 Apr 2010 Updated: 11 Jun 2010
Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 06 May 2010 Title: Chapter 36: Chapter 36

When I first started this story, I was a little put off by the how FAST everything one was moving; meeting, falling in love, getting married, buying a house, inheriting billions, etc.  I know it's fiction but still feel even fiction needs a bit of reality.

I continued reading because I was curious to see how it progress....and it was good.  I was enjoying your writing and it was entertaining as it should be.

However, when I finished reading this chapter, I have changed my original thought of this story.  This chapter was AMAZING and I was completely drawn into the performances and the emotion that was so strong and evident in your writing.  Honestly in my opinion, this chapter is your best work EVER!

Thank you for sharing your talent...it was mind blowing!



Author's Response:

Thank you so much. I will admit that the first part of this story progressed too fast. In my opinion, this chapter was a pivotal for the progression of the story. I have finsihed this story and I hope that you enjoy the next thirry some odd chapters that are left.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 06 May 2010 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Thanks!  I'm so glad this story is complete.  Nothing worse than getting so involved in a story just to have it go stalemate for months on end.  I know RL takes priority as it should but I am grateful that this is done so I know I won't have to wait months for updates.

Also...although I'm a sucker for HEA and by no means am I asking or hinting for how it will turn out, for some reason...if this one ends with sorrow, it's okay and maybe even somewhat fitting.  Now...I know you said it's complete so if Bella does beat the leukemia or it goes into remission, I would be so happy.  If, however, you have decided that she follows her mother's outcome, it would give me peace knowing she got to do some if not all of what she wanted to accomplish!

Again....fantastic chapter - your best work do date for this story!



Author's Response:

I am the same way. I can promise you that everthing I start, I finish. I may have to take a few days to regroup but I always finish what I start. I hate when people start stories and leave them unfinished. Trust me, with three kids and fulltime school, I know about being busy.

Anyway, I can't promise a HEA but I do promise that I don't leave loose ends :)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 07 May 2010 Title: Chapter 37: Chapter 37

It is so hard to watch a person die right before your eyes.  I've been through it twice in the past 3 years and it's never easy.  With the characters being so young, it's even harder.  As long as there is a chance, there is hope.

This must have been a difficult chapter to write and I'm sure it will only get worse before it may get better.  Good job!

 



Author's Response:

Thank you. It was a diffecult chapter to write. I get very emotionally attached to each story I write, and this one really got to me.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 08 May 2010 Title: Chapter 38: Chapter 38

My heart aches for them. Thanks for not sugar coating stuff; makes it more realistic.

Author's Response:

Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 09 May 2010 Title: Chapter 39: Chapter 39

Glad you recognize Bella's bitchiness ;-)

Yes, it's understanable that's she's tired of being tired, sick, the freak, etc., but after she's done feeling sorry for herself, she had to think of the others since once she's dead, she stops feeling but for those she leaves behind, it will hurt forever.

Okay, I'm getting off my soap box.  Just that Bella makes me so mad sometimes and I understand her frustration but she has so much to live for and I'd hate for her to give up the fight just yet!



Author's Response:

I know. I think it's important to show this stage though. Too many story sugar coat it. Bella has given up so much because of the cancer, so right now to commit to a transplant would be very difficult. It's hard for everyone to understand the hopelessness she feels right now.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 10 May 2010 Title: Chapter 40: Chapter 40

Yay!!!!!!  So glad Lauren is actually a good one here!  Fingers crossed all goes well. 



Author's Response:

Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 11 May 2010 Title: Chapter 41: Chapter 41

You've really seem to have captured Bella's fears & concerns. Love she and Edward have reconnected!!

Author's Response:

Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 12 May 2010 Title: Chapter 42: Chapter 42

I think you are capturing her mood swings perfectly.  On the outside she may seem bipolar but really, she's just trying to get a handle on stuff.  Like a rollercoaster; up and down.  Good job!  Glad she's fighting a bit and agreeing to the Bone Marrow transplant. 



Author's Response:

Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 14 May 2010 Title: Chapter 44: Chapter 44


"Feel the love"....what a wonderful thing for all of them to do for Bella and Edward.  If she doesn't make it, at least she will have her memory of attending Prom and her friends and family will as well.



Author's Response: Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 15 May 2010 Title: Chapter 45: Chapter 45

Very sweet and poignant!  I liked how you slowed down the drama and just let them enjoy.



Author's Response:

Thank you

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 17 May 2010 Title: Chapter 47: Chapter 47

Bellas bucket list & Edward is helping her. Has she frozen eggs in case she survives?

Author's Response:

Thank you, no she hasn't:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 21 May 2010 Title: Chapter 51: Chapter 51

Emotional can't begin to describe the chapter.  Brought tears to my eyes when reading her dream.  Heartwrenching!



Author's Response:

I cried like a baby when writing this one. Well, most of this story, actually.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 22 May 2010 Title: Chapter 52: Chapter 52

You can feel her fear. Well done.

Author's Response: Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 24 May 2010 Title: Chapter 54: Chapter 54

It was good. Can't rush things. It's a slow process.

Author's Response:

Yes, it is:) Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 26 May 2010 Title: Chapter 56: Chapter 56

Hoping it's not the end for Bella. She's fought so hard & has so much still to live for.

Author's Response:

Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 26 May 2010 Title: Chapter 56: Chapter 56

Hoping it's not the end for Bella. She's fought so hard & has so much still to live for.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 01 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 61: Chapter 61

Not much to add but want to make sure this story gets all the reviews it so deserves!  Thank you for not letting Bella die.



Author's Response: Thank you

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 02 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 62: Chapter 62

*Two Thumbs Up*



Author's Response:

Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 04 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 64: Chapter 64

Loved how they played Carlisle!!!  Made me laugh.



Author's Response:

Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 07 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 66: Chapter 66

Good prank & even better conclusion.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 08 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 67: Chapter 67

Excellent! Thanks for giving them their HEA!

Author's Response:

You're welcome but it's not over yet! A few more chapters to go!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 09 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 68: Chapter 68

I loved how you incorporated Ashton & Martin into the story. So many other fanfics have Edward driving his prized Aston Martin. Very cute and a great chapter. Love the ribbing Edward gets for being so amorous!

Author's Response:

Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 10 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 69: Chapter 69

Good chapter. A bit scared that Bella's last words to Emmett are a precursor of sadness to come.

Author's Response:

Thanks:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 11 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 70: Chapter 70

Beautifully done! I loved how you wrapped up all the loose ends. Sorry about those whom lost or losing their fight with cancer.
Thanks for the ride; so worth the thrills, highs and lows!

Author's Response:

Thank you so much:)

Summary: Past Featured Story

Banner for TFICF

Bella finds herself in dire financial need and takes drastic action -- she offers her virginity up for auction.  Will this desperate plan to save her college education actually turn out to be a second chance at love? 

 

This story was  made possible by the generous contribution of CandraJade to the Support Stacie Auction and is based on her fabulous prompt.

 

**If you are not old enough to purchase Adult Material, you are not old enough to read this story.  Rated for content and sex in later chapters.**

 

fs

 


Categories: Twilight, Canon Pairings, All Human
Characters: Bella/Edward
Genre: None
Language: None
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: None
Chapters: 13 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 39762 Read Count: 45132
[Report This] Published: 11 Apr 2010 Updated: 23 Sep 2012
Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 25 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 2: Decisions

Excellent. Slow burn.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 25 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 3: Chapter 3: Regrets

Good job. HS peer pressure has ruined many a true love.
You should post early -

Author's Response:

Thanks!

It really has spoiled many a good thing.

More soon.  Thanks for reading!!!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 29 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 4: Whatever Could Go Wrong, Probably Will...

OK - have to be honest and say I wasn't happy with how it all went down.  I do get Bella's feelings and because it's someone she knows as well as had a crush on, it's believable for her to react this way.

Maybe the way Edward went about meeting with her could have gone better.  Hoping they both start being honest and although Bella needs the money for school and Edward obviously wants to help her by using his entire inheritance, maybe a loan of some sort will be discussed in order to save the friendship/relationship.  We'll see I guess!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 07 May 2010 Title: Chapter 5: Chapter 5: Second Chances

So glad they are finally communicating face to face and not through emails or misguided letters.  You can really see a person's sincerity when they are in front of you.

So glad both had the courage to say what's in their hearts!

Looking forward to the moment of truth!  Good job! 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 13 May 2010 Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 6: The Moment of Truth

Yup!!!! Want more now please. That was hot cmon ladies, I know you can do more!!! Don't make e's wait ten more days. Not fair to keep us in suspense and all hot & bothered!!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 20 May 2010 Title: Chapter 7: Chapter 7: Fairytales Really Can Come True

Very sweet!  I love the post coital conversation!!  So I guess the next question is will this wind up in a few more chapters or do you plan on continuing it as the fairytale is ending and real life has to come back into play.  This was a wonderful novella.  I loved the premise and everything leading up to the HEA but wondering if the HEA is here or is there more.  Guess that's why you're the writers and I'm the reader!  Good job!  



Author's Response:

So glad you enjoyed it.  We certainly have fun with the details!  We are in the middle of discussing what our plans for the future of this story will be.  ;D

Thanks so much for reading and for leavin' some love!!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 05 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 8: Chapter 8: The Morning After

Great job as usual.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 12 Nov 2010 Title: Chapter 9: Chapter 9: To Be or Not To Be

Two stupid kids trying to make the other happy while being miserable themselves. If they would just talk & COMPROMISE maybe they Bella could go to school & they could still date. It shouldn't have to be one or the other. Typical Edward playing the martyr & typical Bella, not speaking her mind!
Hope these kids get their act together before anymore heartache is wasted!
Good job...appreciate the synopsis so we didn't have to reread to get caught up!

Author's Response:

Thanks for the review.  I think miscommunication is Bella and Edward's hallmark.  And it is why people can write long ass stories about them -- it takes that long to get them on the right page at the same time.  Oh, to be young again.  Next chapter will be up soon -- it includes some intervention...that's all I'm gonna say...

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 23 Nov 2010 Title: Chapter 10: Chapter 10: Best Laid Plans

Loved it! Between Emmett & Alice, it's gonna be a doozy! I loved maestro's pathetic word vomit to Alice. Fate, I tell you!!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 24 Dec 2010 Title: Chapter 11: Chapter 11: Charge of the Cavalry

Finally....these two have gotten their act together!
Great timing!!

Ethics Be Damned by krazyk85 Rated: NC-17 starstarstarstarstar [Reviews - 489]
Summary: Past Featured Story

ebd

Banner made by xrxdanixrx

Bella Swan is a 28 year old woman who is a narcotics detective for the Seattle Police Department. Bella is assigned to go undercover as a high school student to bring down a massive drug ring fronted by the elusive Drug Lord Aro Volturi. Bella soon finds herself falling for her English teacher Edward Masen...

Edward Masen is instantly attracted to this new student, but can't pursue a relationship with a young girl.

 Will these two keep things in perspective or will their ethics be damned?

Based loosely on 21 Jumpstreet and Never Been Kissed

d

fs


Categories: Twilight, Canon Pairings, All Human
Characters: Bella/Edward
Genre: None
Language: None
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: Ageise02's not read yet, Drive's Stories to read that are Completed and Not completed, G8or Favor8s Read
Chapters: 35 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 191208 Read Count: 71569
[Report This] Published: 12 Apr 2010 Updated: 23 Dec 2010
Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 19 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter 2

I don't think you'll need to beg for reviews....this story is good!

I'm enjoying the dual POV's and how you don't rehash the same scenes but help make the story go forward (does that make sense?).

Onto chapter 3~ 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 19 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 3: Chapter 3

No....upload all 19 now!!!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 19 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 4

Yes please....more please!!  Don't make us wait!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 19 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 5: Chapter 5

Dayum!!!  If I had a teacher as HOT as Edward, I probably would have done better in school!!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 19 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 6

Yay Yay Yay !!!  So glad the truth is out for them!!!

Not so sure about the date thing.....would hate for either to get hurt!  

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 19 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 7: Chapter 7

Yay Yay Yay again!!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 20 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 8: Chapter 8

Dum de dum dum......DUM!!!!

Have I told you I like this story a lot!!  I do!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 20 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 9: Chapter 9

Double standards indeed!  Didn't Edward recognize Emmett from school and Bella should have told Rose about Alice and Jasper!

Bet heads would have turned then!!

 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 20 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 10: Chapter 10

Awesome job!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 20 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 11: Chapter 11

You did great!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 20 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 12: Chapter12

Hope not too much drama!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 20 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 13: Chapter 13

Good chapter. Glad James is kinda dense & not suspicious. I would have told James that Edward was Bella's uncle but didn't want anyone to know.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 20 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 14: Chapter 14

It was good!  Almost had heart failure when Tanya appeared and Bella ran out and tried to break up with Edward.

Thank goodness Edward didn't go all emo and tell her he'd wait forever for her!  He needed to tell her to make a decision and he wasn't going to "pine" for her! If he hadn't given her the ultimatum, she would have waffled and used her job as an excuse...Fish or cut bait!!

I'm sure the James situation will heat up and while I wish Bella and Edward would go to the Gala together, it may be too "public" and Edward needs to accept that Bella has a job to complete and once it's over, there will be other opportunities to be together.

I'm afraid if Bella blows off James and accompanies Edward, Aro (or his spy/minions) will see B&E together and more drama will occur!

Glad you are a quick updater....looking forward to seeing how this all plays out.

BTW - Tanya-get a clue and leave!!!      

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 25 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 15: Chapter 15

I think you're right on target with this story.  Not every story has to have 99% romance and 1% plotline.  I think the "case" they are on is what makes this story unique and not just another meet, deny, succumb, HEA.

Glad Alice heard what was going on.  Don't think I would like to see Bella get in over her head or in danger.  The more you know, the better off you are.  Think V being ok with her boyfriend going out with other girls is just her insecurity of believing whatever he's dishing, she'll take it.  Low self esteem is her issue.

Looking forward to more!!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 04 May 2010 Title: Chapter 17: Chapter 17

Of course James forced himself on Angela.  He's just that type of guy...he needs to be put away for good.

The story line is heating up and it's going to be interesting how the "team" corrals the high schoolers and then get to Aro!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 10 May 2010 Title: Chapter 18: Chapter 18

Oh no you didn't!!  Talk about a heart stopping cliffie!!  Please update soon.  I have to know what the hell happened!  Did James pick her up?  Why didn't she just tell him she'd meet him at the party?  She's supposed to be a professional - self preservation, etc.  OMG - I'll be waiting for the update....will have to pacify myself with "he's in HS, she's an adult cop, she will be okay, she will be okay, she will be okay....." 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 14 May 2010 Title: Chapter 19: Chapter 19

I thought this was a great chapter.  It would not have been realistic if James had gotten the best of a veteren cop.  He is a 17 year old BOY and she's a seasoned, trained 28 year old cop who has been called one of the best.

I think the way you wrote it was very believable.  So glad Emmett and Alice got there when they did.  Edward being left at the benefit was right on the money.  His actions, mannerisms, heck everything, was very realistic.

Good job!!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 01 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 22: Chapter 22

No hate here.  It would have really been OOC for Bella to jump at the chance and say YES.  It will happen;, I can feel it.  Let Edward do it the "proper" way and all will be well. 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 08 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 23: Chapter 23

Wow! Didn't see that one coming! Does Aro know who Isabella is & what she does? He must! I'm assuming the family isn't aware of Aro' extra curricular businesses! Good blindside!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 09 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 24: Chapter 24

Never saw the Aro Tanya connection but she's such a bitch & so clueless. I'm kinda glad she is so stupid & thinks she's going to cause such a scandal. This kinda puts Aro in alert but what confuses me is that Aro purposely told Bella the wrong directions to the bathroom so he has something up his sleeve or we, the readers, are in for another twisted blindside. In any case, good job!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 15 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 25: Chapter 25

No, I don't think Bella signed Edward's death warrant.  They have trust issues, especially Edward so I think it was an act of faith for Bella to show him Aro's file.  I always believe knowledge is power and it's better to know than not.

So...the italian was directed towards Tanya?  She is dumber than gum!  Or...is Bella somehow Aro's long lost, unknown niece??  So glad Beth and Ed put Tanya in her place!!

Great chapter!

 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 18 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 26: Chapter 26

Excellent!  Thank you for letting everyone "talk it out"...it explained a lot and filled in the blanks!

 

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 25 Jun 2010 Title: Chapter 27: Chapter 27

I think they made the right decision as well. Hmm...hope Edward will be okay.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 07 Jul 2010 Title: Chapter 29: Chapter 29

Nothing Aro does surprises me. I just hope he didn't realize Charlie was Bella's dad! Good thing is Charlie must realize something is wrong & I hope he doesn't call SPD or he may get the mole & alert Aro.
Can't for more!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 09 Jul 2010 Title: Chapter 30: Chapter 30

Hate it? Are you kidding? I loved it! I know there is still stuff to take care of like who the real mole is in the SPD! However, Aro & James are dead, Tanya is a bitch & Bella & Edward are together!
Looking forward to more!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 15 Jul 2010 Title: Chapter 31: Chapter 31

I love where Edwards head is...who cares about after care....when can he have sex!
Yup...think Edward may be asking Charlies permission to marry Bella!
Loved this...can't wait for more but am curious who the mole is. Could it be Carlisle?

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 21 Jul 2010 Title: Chapter 32: Chapter 32

Gotta love Seth! good job!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star
Date: 27 Jul 2010 Title: Chapter 33: Chapter 33

Very sweet & old fashioned. Kids today dont appreciate the sentiment of asking the fathers permission to marry the daughter.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 06 Aug 2010 Title: Chapter 34: Chapter 34

I thought the story was perfect.  I loved how it started; Bella knowing the truth but Edward not and him arguing with himself about being attracted to a student.  I like how the truth was revealed, how they were able to work around it, how Tanya showed her true colors, Aro dying, Carlisle not being the bad guy, the culmination of their love and most of all, the proposal.  The saying on Edward's white board is so true. 

I'm looking forward to the epilogue.  It's been a tremendous journey and I've enjoyed it!

 



Author's Response: Awe thank you so much for saying such sweet things, and you know I was going to make Carlisle a bad guy..you know for a twist, but I opted against it. It's best to keep in a good guy..that way there is always a chance for Bella to get her job back...that still if she wants it. I also tried to make E's proposal memorable and I knew he would take her back to where it all beginned. I promise not to make you wait to long for the epi..I just got to figure out what I want to say. Thank you again for being awesome and sticking with this story :)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 24 Dec 2010 Title: Chapter 35: Epilogue

Loved it! It was the perfect ceremony for them!

Summary: Past Featured Story

golf

 

Taking place at the 1956 US Open, 20 year-old amateur golfer Isabella Swan becomes the first women to ever compete at a professional golf event.  With local caddie Edward Cullen at her side as she makes her attempt at history, she will grow more in the span of this weekend then she has in her entire life as she plays against the best players in the world, battling gender roles and the boys club that is this “gentlemen’s game.”  Will she be able to pull out an against the odds victory, or will the prize she wins be even more valuable.

fs

 


Categories: Twilight, Canon Pairings, All Human
Characters: Bella/Edward
Genre: None
Language: None
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: None
Chapters: 6 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 34179 Read Count: 3213
[Report This] Published: 14 Apr 2010 Updated: 22 Oct 2010
Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarhalf-star
Date: 21 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 2: The Start of Something

I like the storyline but got lost and bogged down with all the golf references, etc.  I'm sure it wouldn't be a problem for someone who plays golf but I found it confusing.

I like your writing so I'll muddle through!  Good concept! 



Author's Response:

Thanks...as the story starts to take more precident over the actual golf, it may be easier to follow.  Also, when Alice goes to the last two rounds it will help becuase she knows nothing of golf so Jasper will have to help her out.  I'm trying to make it as reader friendly as possible, so thanks for letting me know that it was a little rough, I'm trying to make the next one a little less golfy as far as terms so that way you can understand what's happening.  The most important thing to know is the end of round scores and that the player with the lowest score is doing the best, the really important thing about the rounds of golf isn't actually the golf, but more the interactions between characters.  Thanks for sticking with it.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed
Date: 22 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 1: A Historic Journey

No worries - I have a basic idea of golf but just got confused with the foursome, groups and all that stuff.

I really like your writing and appreciate the author notes as the beginning and end as it helps clarify a lot!

Thanks again....I'd love to see Royce gets his comuppence.  What a jerk!!  Also, no need to send me a special message but in your next update, would you mind listing the ages of Bella, Edward & Jasper?  You let us know Alice is still 17!  ;)



Author's Response:

The groupings in golf are kind of funny...they're usually called pairs or twosomes, threesomes and foursomes.  That used to crack me up because when you're a teen, you realize pretty quick just how sexual the golf terms can sound.

In tournament golf, before the cut is made, (the cut happens after the second round, eliminating the players who have little shot of winning and therefore are out of the money race as well) they play in threesomes, with the best golfers going out first, but after the cut they flip it and have twosomes because there are usually around half the number of players so they can play in smaller groups and the better players go out last. 

Like I said anything that confuses you, let me know...I have A Cullen Wannabe, my ever trusty beta on this as well, who doesn't know too much about golf as a buffer so if she gets confused then I add in the term to the glossary.  I did the a/n knowing that golf baffles me sometimes...my dad will get into a story about a round he caddied for and I'll be like, "What in the heck did he just say?"  My knowledge of golf has gotten much better in the last year or so as I watch it more, but I get lost too, which is why pops is figuring out the specifics and then letting me write the story how I want it and he makes the golf work for me.  I wanted someone who walked in basically knowing what you learn from a few holes of mini golf to be able to follow it, because I don't want to assume anything, especially with international readers.

Royce will definitely get to you even more...just remember, good wins out.  I wanted to reply when I saw the review so there is no problem here in answering the question...I'm wasn't sure if it made it in there somewhere, but Bella's 20 and the boys are 22.  Edward was drafted in 1951 at the age of 18, so he'll be turning 23 in June, his birthday is actually the week after the tournament.  Now you see why Jasper moved as soon as he could...he knew he loved her, but had to wait until it was acceptable and do right by the Cullen's who had taken him in.  I'm going to put the full listing so you can see where they fit in with everyone else.

Thanks again for the constant support and for reading this monster response.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 29 Apr 2010 Title: Chapter 3: A Storm on the Horizon

Great chapter.  Got a bit confused on the scoring so thanks for the chart in the a/n.  Wow....knowing you're willing to marry someone 2 days after you meet is fast and falling in love as well.  I guess in the day, people didn't waste time.

Thanks for the photos and it was funny how Bella "fixed" her dress.  Glad you didn't spoil it with a *lemon*; doesn't seem like that kind of story filled with gratuitious sex just for smuts sake.  I'm sure there may be a little lemon later on but glad you kept with the era and left it innocent!  It was great the way you wrote it. 



Author's Response:

I knew it would get harder to keep track so I'm gonna keep that going.  Edward's been to war, so he knows how quickly life can change and he knows how much having Bella walk away hurt and how much he wants to fix it. 

I've done that on a boat trying not to flash everyone so I had to put it in. 

There will be a lemon but it is going to be true to the time and it will be a lot sweeter because of the era.  Thanks again for the love.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 23 Oct 2010 Title: Chapter 6: Epilogue: A Life Well Played

Perfection! Thank you for a great Summation!! It was wonderful the way you wrote their life story!

Author's Response:

Thank you so much, I really took a long time with this one and I've been humbled by the response.  Thanks for the love.  I wanted to tell the rest of their story in an interesting and sintsink (?) way.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 06 May 2010 Title: Chapter 4: A Haven in the Storm

Again, this was a perfect chapter. Nice to see the twist of Royce being the attacker instead of a James.
Protective Edward is so dreamy!! Love the curlers; so keeping with the generation.
Sad it's coming to an end so soon. I've really loved this!!

Author's Response:

Thank you so much!  Royce was the perfect person in this case and he does have the history.  I loved the protective Edward too, another thing the war taught him.  The curlers were something I thought of watching mash and seeing the nurses running out with them in and I thought about how shes the only one hes seen like that in a true intimate nature so I had to add the little touch.  I planned this not thinkng many people would like it because of the golf, I wrote it more for me than anything but now I feel like there may be a request for some outtakes after the epi.  Thanks again~

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 27 May 2010 Title: Chapter 5: Destiny in the Making

Perfectly done as usual...sorry to see it ending but so worth the ride.  Thanks for sharing this novella.  I think you captured the time period well and didn't add anything extra just for words sake.  Less is sometimes more and it worked well in this case.

Good work! 



Author's Response:

I always thought of this as a novella and I'm actually surprised by the response I've gotten.  Thanks for the compliments, I worked really hard on the tone and the language and the time references so it would play well.  Hope you like the epi~

Summary:

Bella Swan is starting a new job with the FBI. Not only does she have to prove to the boys that she belongs but she has to face the demons from her past before they find her. NC-17 for language and lemons B/E, R/Em, A/J, Es/C

 

b


Categories: Canon Pairings, Twilight, All Human
Characters: Bella/Edward
Genre: None
Language: None
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: G8or Favor8s Read, My Favorite Stories, The FBI Saga, to read
Chapters: 41 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 95413 Read Count: 135449
[Report This] Published: 15 Apr 2010 Updated: 25 May 2010
Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 03 May 2010 Title: Chapter 19: Chapter 19

You've got a way with words. Dumdedumdum dum!! Good writing!

Author's Response:

Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 04 May 2010 Title: Chapter 20: Chapter 20

Absolutely hearing about what Carlisle went through as a child helps.  Events in people's lives usually shape their outlook and path...sometimes positively and sometimes negatively.  It's up to individual to chose what path to take.



Author's Response:

I agree 100%!! Thank you:)

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar
Date: 05 May 2010 Title: Chapter 21: Chapter 21

Oh my! Dum Dee dum dum!! Love the cliffie but hope you update soon!

Author's Response:

Thanks:)