Membership status: Member
Bio:
I'm probably just here to read.
(Famous last words.)
You know those fics where Edward doesn't come back and Bella forgets about him and five seconds later she's in bed with Jacob and none of it makes any damn sense?
Yeah, this isn't one of them.
A BELLIE AWARDS NOMINEE!
This story picks up from the moment in New Moon when Jacob has driven Bella home after the cliff diving incident, right before he catches the scent of Alice. Only in this telling, Alice wasn't looking, so there's no sudden appearance at Bella's house, no Rosalie calling Edward and sending him on a suicidal mission to Volterra, and no reason for Bella to do anything but believe that Edward didn't love her anymore. This is simply a story of what might have happened if everyone stayed mostly in character and Edward's return was delayed. Yes, delayed. Because we all know that he was "this close" to coming back on his own anyhow.
So what would have happened if Bella had tried to move on with her life? Would she have found happiness with Jacob? And would Edward be too late?
* First in a series of stories that tell of Bella and Jacob during Edward's absence, Bella's start at college, and the Cullens' eventual return.
~I thought of Jacob’s warm arms wrapped around me, his infectious laughter, and his ability to keep me from falling to pieces again… The pain choking my heart relaxed and I could breathe.~
~“More than anything,” I whispered, not caring what I'd just agreed to. When it came to Bella, it didn't matter what the question was. I just wanted.~
Winner of:
Best Author, Most Romantic, Favorite Jacob, Most Suspenseful, & Best WIP in the Wolfpack Awards | Best Non-Canon Pairing (Incomplete) and Best WIP in the Moonlight Awards | Best During the Series in the Razzle Dazzle Awards | The Storyteller Award in the Shimmer Awards | Best JacobxBella in the Silent Tear Awards | Best Jacob Point of View in the Twilight Twins Awards
Categories: Twilight, Alternate Universe
Characters: None
Genre: Romance, Young Adult
Language: English
TWCS Romance Contest: None
Series: A Blazing Sun, 108.9, Jacob Black Wins the Girl
Chapters: 76 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 163880 Read Count: 35938
Date: 22 Mar 2010 Title: Chapter 74: Distractions: Jacob's POV
I've really enjoyed reading this. I don't think it's as "slow" as I thought it was going to be. I don't really like J/B stories where they just jumped right into the relationship. And while I felt that your characters jumped there was a lot of halting and hesitation going on at the same time which I think makes the story easier to read because no matter what anyone says reading 25 chapters and the characters still not getting together can get irritating for the reader (I'm definitely guilty of writing that).
I think the hesitation and exploration of both sides of the stories and the side stories make Breathe Again easier to read, but I also think that going over the same event twice was unneeded at certain points. Sometimes it was repetitive. Don't be afraid of summerizing what they are saying in the second POV. When both conversations just go with "he said/she said" there's really no reason to repeat them unless some new information is given in the narrative.
Most of all, I really, really, really love the way you wrote Charlie. You gave him the typical father figure role but with a little more growth going on. Even with out the side story you know that he's going through stuff too. I think that people have a hard time writing that and tend to just use Charlie as a device to get something or have one of the characters go through some sort of turmoil. I love that Charlie is a bit of a liberal parent, what with letting Jake stay over, but has his reasoning for it. I also really love his dialogue. I like that he's got the father dialogue but also says things that are truly funny or "Charlie". You gave him a personality beyond father, which is great. I think you did a good job of keeping all the minor characters in character. They aren't just people there to keep a conversation flowing or to further a plot, like with Charlie, they all have their own lives going on as well.
I really can't wait to read more of this!
Samantha
Author's Response:
The truth is that this is less a story and more an exploration in differing perceptions of the same events. The story was originally intended to be only a few chapters in length, and I never anticipated its popularity to explode like it did. I initially thought nothing of extending it a bit for the readers who wanted more---after all, the rest of the story resided in my mind anyway, so what would it hurt to simply type it out, right? I keep forgetting that the readers on this site weren't around for the beginning a year and a half ago, and they are entirely unaware of the reasoning behind the redundancy. I do have a few other stories with differing POVs---I think I have only two of them posted publicly at the moment, and they aren't repetitive at all. I guess you could say they are what you wold expect from a story that shows the views of two different characters. I'm not disagreeing with you--it is absolutley repetitive, and I'm surprised so many of my readers were on board with that idea from the get-go. If anything, though, this is more an indulgence of my want to delve too deeply into every detail, while my other stories are more traditional in format and are intended for public enjoyment. It's rather ironic that the one I've been writing solely for my own enjoyment is the one that's most popular.