Login
Register a New Account


Follow Us
      

You must login (register a new account) to review.
Reviewer: twirob13 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Jun 2016 9:57 PM Title: Return of the King

thanks so much for sharing this cool and exciting little story with us ;D

Reviewer: Aether Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 17 Jun 2016 3:23 AM Title: Return of the King

Great story.  The only thing I wondered about was the agents who were killed while guarding Rose.  If I was reading correctly Jacob should have been on duty.  Yet there was no mention of his death.  

Again, great story!  Thanks!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 17 Oct 2015 8:50 AM Title: Return of the King

That was a fitting end to Caulfield's trial. Good to know he paid for his many crimes, just too bad they couldn't kill him twenty-eight or so times! Pretty exciting for Bella and Edward, too, having their son pop into the world in such a rush!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 17 Oct 2015 8:28 AM Title: Return of the King

That turned out much better than it might have, with Rose and Bella both safe and not too hurt!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 17 Oct 2015 8:14 AM Title: Return of the King

Here's to her finding a way out of her restraints! Plus, good for Rose, at least they got her back!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 17 Oct 2015 7:51 AM Title: Return of the King

This is the part I always hate, when the good person goes up against the really bad guy! Things do not always go well!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 17 Oct 2015 7:27 AM Title: Return of the King

Just what I was afraid of, that this sick bastard  is fixating on Bella!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 Oct 2015 10:29 PM Title: Return of the King

I smelled a rat as soon as Bella started questioning Victoria, something was just off about her story!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 Oct 2015 10:17 PM Title: Return of the King

Poor Rosalie and poor Emmett! God only knows what that monster is doing to her! To have survived the first assault , only to fall into the same horror again is just hideous! They must find and rescue her!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 Oct 2015 9:58 PM Title: Return of the King

The twin thing would be a huge break in the case andthe possible solution! Boy, the team really is smart and relentless  chasing clues! It's great that Edward finally asked if he had a chance with Bella, too!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 Oct 2015 9:33 PM Title: Return of the King

Since we know there's no magic involved in this, there somewhere has to be a rational explanation! It may well be twisted and devious on someone's part, but it will be there! Poor Bella, this is all falling on her like a ton of bricks!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Oct 2015 11:11 PM Title: Return of the King

Hmm! Jake and Bella in a comforting embrace, a hurt look on Edward's faceand the plot thickens! Looks like maybe he has feelings for his boss, perhaps! I loathe Jane already, by the way, what a bitch!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Oct 2015 9:36 PM Title: Return of the King

Jane the pain, huh? Sounds like there's interesting history there! Seems to be a mutual admiration society going on here, between Bella , Edward and his dad!

Reviewer: k1942 Signed [Report This]
Date: 15 Oct 2015 9:14 PM Title: Return of the King

This is starting out as gripping as any episode of the television shows you mentioned! What a ghastly crime scene! You are sure getting it right!

Reviewer: Apl Signed [Report This]
Date: 02 Feb 2015 9:26 PM Title: Return of the King

enjoyed this story!!

Reviewer: LulaGrace Signed [Report This]
Date: 09 Oct 2012 11:48 AM Title: Return of the King

Great, quick read! 

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 12:06 PM Title: Return of the King

:) loved this story

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 12:05 PM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 12:04 PM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 12:03 PM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 12:02 PM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 12:01 PM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 12:00 PM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 11:59 AM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 11:58 AM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 11:57 AM Title: Return of the King

:))

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 11:56 AM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: debslmac Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Sep 2012 11:55 AM Title: Return of the King

:)

Reviewer: kneon Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 03 Feb 2011 1:54 AM Title: Return of the King

Great story.  Good luck with your new book.  I'll be waiting for more stories.

Reviewer: kneon Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 03 Feb 2011 1:26 AM Title: Return of the King

Great ending.

Reviewer: kneon Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 03 Feb 2011 1:04 AM Title: Return of the King

Wow. great chapter.

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 10:26 PM Title: Return of the King

I loved it I really hope after your break that you will write more fro these two great story!

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 10:04 PM Title: Return of the King

I knew Bella could take James down that was really good

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 9:48 PM Title: Return of the King

I hope her team finds her soon

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 9:42 PM Title: Return of the King

Oh crap I hope Bella can stop him and still be safe .

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 9:32 PM Title: Return of the King

I knew that he was going to come after her I just hope Edward is as good as Bella thinks he his and gets to him  fast.

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 9:11 PM Title: Return of the King

I know Victoria and James are in on this together .I just hope Bella and the team can find Rose soon .

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 9:00 PM Title: Return of the King

Oh God poor Rose they have to find her soon I am freaking out .I really love this story

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 8:50 PM Title: Return of the King

I knew it I am so loving this story but I know there will be more bumps in the road .Aww that was so cute of Edward to ask her out love him !!!! Great story

 

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 8:33 PM Title: Return of the King

I bet he has a twin or they put his twin in jail .This is really good I am hooked

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 8:17 PM Title: Return of the King

Aww Edward likes her now he thinks Jake is with her.And wow what a big bitch Jane is lol Bella is better than her.

Reviewer: halloweenlover Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 29 Jan 2011 7:58 PM Title: Return of the King

This is really good I can't wait to find out who is behind this and how Bella and her team get him!!!

Reviewer: troberts Signed [Report This]
Date: 28 Jan 2011 1:40 PM Title: Return of the King

To bad he didnt die on that day I am so happy he gets to look forward to his death and Bella and Edward get to look forward to there new life.  Great short story Thanks

Reviewer: IrishArtist25 Signed [Report This]
Date: 28 Jan 2011 2:16 AM Title: Return of the King

Not gonna lie, I definitely teared up at the end with the birth. 

Love love love your stories. Can't wait til we have some more of your fabulous writing.  Good luck working on your second novel! And congratulations :)

Reviewer: My Not-So-Secret Obsession Signed [Report This]
Date: 27 Jan 2011 6:08 PM Title: Return of the King

AW, Parker, I love that name=) I can't believe Bella was able to wait through all those contractions just to hear "guilty" but shes a fighter. Amazing story. I can't wait to read your other works.

~My Not-So-Secret Obssession

Reviewer: MarilagML Signed [Report This]
Date: 27 Jan 2011 4:55 PM Title: Return of the King

Love the ending.  This isn't the usual writing you do so I'm a little apprehensive to check on it until everything is posted.  Once it is completed, I devoured the entire thing.

Reviewer: anakinsmom Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 27 Jan 2011 4:12 PM Title: Return of the King

Great story, great wrap up and happy tears at the end.

Yes, we need more from this team.

We will be patient (cough cough) while you take care of your other projects and hope to hear from you again soon with another great story.

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 26 Jan 2011 11:02 PM Title: Return of the King

Beautiful!!

Reviewer: troberts Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Jan 2011 7:13 PM Title: Return of the King

Oh thank god she got away and they got the bastard to bad he didnt try to shoot someone so they could of killed him.

Reviewer: misskT225 Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Jan 2011 4:38 PM Title: Return of the King

I have to tell you how much i love this story....you didnt shy away from any of the scarier or sickening details and for that i commend you.I would like to think that even if my favorite characters werent in this story i would've still read it. This is an amazing story. Keep up the good work

kT

Reviewer: anakinsmom Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 26 Jan 2011 3:34 PM Title: Return of the King

I know we still have the epi to go but I can really see a sequel here or possibly even a series with the great team you've assembled. I love the forensics and crime solving aspect so much that I hate to see it end here.



Author's Response:

I know I would like to see more, but don't know if I'd have the time to do it.  I've thought about adding it to the series thing and seeing of others were interested in building on it.  I'll have to look into that.



Author's Response:

I know I would like to see more, but don't know if I'd have the time to do it.  I've thought about adding it to the series thing and seeing of others were interested in building on it.  I'll have to look into that.

Reviewer: Noble Korhedron Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Jan 2011 2:00 PM Title: Return of the King

Hmm, good!! Hope they roast the fucker this time - how's THIS for a death notice headline -"Caulfield Cooked in Marion by "Old Sparky!' "

Reviewer: My Not-So-Secret Obsession Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Jan 2011 1:56 PM Title: Return of the King

EEEK! Yay, she's free and they're together=) haha, great chapter, I think all your information about the case (even if made up) and forensics makes the story so much more incredible. Please put up the epilogue soon=)

~My Not-So-Secret Obsession

Reviewer: My Not-So-Secret Obsession Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Jan 2011 1:09 PM Title: Return of the King

AHHH, no update soon please! I need to know what happens and make sure Edward finds her. They didn't even go on a date yet. lol. amazing chapters, you're an excellent writer, almost too good because I NEED to know what happens. Update soon=)

~My Not-So-Secret Obsession

Reviewer: Irish_charm Signed [Report This]
Date: 26 Jan 2011 2:06 AM Title: Return of the King

Too short!!!!!!!!

That was really slick him letting Rose go. I love the hidden room. Hopefully the guys don't take too long finding her.

Reviewer: clanmoran Signed [Report This]
Date: 25 Jan 2011 10:33 PM Title: Return of the King

Oh MY, MY, MY!!!  You said there was a cliffy.....I have faith in Bella, she is one smart cookie-----not to mention the EMOTIONS I am sure Edward is going through!!

Reviewer: anakinsmom Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 25 Jan 2011 3:02 PM Title: Return of the King

Killer cliffie indeed!!!!!!!!!!!  He truly is a psychopath!

Edward to the rescue?

Reviewer: troberts Signed [Report This]
Date: 25 Jan 2011 2:38 PM Title: Return of the King

OMG please if she found it Edward has to be able to find it to.  I cant wait till tomorrow what is he planing on doing to her.

Reviewer: mousekemom Signed starstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 25 Jan 2011 12:52 PM Title: Return of the King

Yea, I knew it couldn't be that easy.  So, it was a bit on the short side, but definitely moved the story along.  Are you planning on bouncing POVs or are you sticking to Bella's fight?  Thanks for the update and for sharing your talent with us!  Love the Bones and Supernatural references...campy, but fun!



Author's Response:

No, although you will see a bit of what the guys were going through while after she disappeared in the Epi.

Reviewer: mousekemom Signed [Report This]
Date: 22 Jan 2011 5:05 PM Title: Return of the King

What a great intro!  I am looking forward to figuring out the mastermind and reading the character development.  I loved FDKK and the Wallflower and the Flyboy and am very much looking forward to this story!  Thanks for sharing your talent with us!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Jan 2011 1:47 AM Title: Return of the King

Great!

Reviewer: JayNahNah Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21 Jan 2011 1:36 AM Title: Return of the King

The plot thickens!

Reviewer: kneon Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 9:59 PM Title: Return of the King

I don't know either, but this would be so good, to make a series of stories with the same characters.

Reviewer: Noble Korhedron Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 9:44 PM Title: Return of the King

Needless to say, "Oh-oh, spaghetti-o!!"

Reviewer: amandaolsson Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 8:55 PM Title: Return of the King

Good Chapter.....

Reviewer: amandaolsson Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 8:48 PM Title: Return of the King

Good Chapter.....

Reviewer: amandaolsson Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 8:40 PM Title: Return of the King

Good Chapter.....

Reviewer: troberts Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 7:05 AM Title: Return of the King

OMFG I knew she would go all Bella.  The kiss was sweet and loving and I love that Carlisle knew what is going on with the two of them.

Reviewer: troberts Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 6:42 AM Title: Return of the King

Holly shit this is freaking me out and I love it trill me.  Please tell me she does not pull a Bella and go to him alone????

Reviewer: troberts Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 6:27 AM Title: Return of the King

So Victoria is a lying bitch  did the boys have a sister king to kingsley????  I love Dean and Sam  I do believe I love Dean more tho LOL.

Reviewer: Irish_charm Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 4:30 AM Title: Return of the King

Bella is something always so self sacrificing. I'm sure Rose is going to be pissed when she finds out what Bella is about to do..

This was one of the best chapters yet.....

Reviewer: Irish_charm Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 4:11 AM Title: Return of the King

Now how is she going to ditch Emmett and Edward. I can not see that happening so where are they going to be following her too...

Reviewer: Irish_charm Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 3:50 AM Title: Return of the King

You have twisted everything around so well that while you see the true characters from Twilight they are so far removed that it is truly amazing to read.

Reviewer: kneon Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 3:34 AM Title: Return of the King

Wow, great story.  Can't wait for the next chapter. Hope your son gets better.

Reviewer: Irish_charm Signed [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 3:32 AM Title: Return of the King

This story just gets better and better. There is nothing about it that I do not love. I want to let you kmow how sorry I am that I didn't read and review sooner, but I wanted to reread the first 5 chapters and in order to do that I needed to find a time where I could do it without little eyes around. When I like something I tend to zone and that is not good with a 7 year old.

 



Author's Response:

That's alright hon...I know how it is.  Thanks for the review and glad you are enjoying it~!

Reviewer: kneon Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 19 Jan 2011 2:56 AM Title: Return of the King

Wow, this is really good.  I have thought of making this into a series?  It would be really good.



Author's Response:

You know...I've never done the series thing.  How exactly does that work.

Reviewer: anakinsmom Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 17 Jan 2011 10:09 PM Title: Return of the King

This guy is a major psycho! Great plotting and clue dropping too. On the edge of my seat waiting for more!!!!!

Reviewer: Lilygirl88 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 17 Jan 2011 7:23 PM Title: Return of the King

So it looks like she might be next or is he planning on exchanging rose for her. I can't wait to see what develops next.

Reviewer: kneon Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 16 Jan 2011 4:30 AM Title: Return of the King

HAHAHA I love the Supernatural reference, my sons got me watching that show this past summer. 

 

Wow, more pieces to the puzzle.

Reviewer: lynista Signed [Report This]
Date: 16 Jan 2011 1:11 AM Title: Return of the King

More soon? Like super soon? :) Please! Had to throw in please, it makes things seem nicer.

Reviewer: kneon Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 14 Jan 2011 3:29 AM Title: Return of the King

interesting development.  can't wait to see what happens next.

Reviewer: troberts Signed [Report This]
Date: 14 Jan 2011 2:22 AM Title: Return of the King

No not Rose OMG.  At least they know who they are looking for only thing they have to do is find that needle in the hay stack.  I am so happy to get an update on this story thanks.

Reviewer: amandaolsson Signed [Report This]
Date: 13 Jan 2011 3:35 PM Title: Return of the King

Good Chapter.....

Reviewer: Irish_charm Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Nov 2010 7:21 PM Title: Return of the King

This is really great. I thought that maybe it was a twin but put that out of my mind because I thought for sure that it would of come out in his trial. I'm really glad that you went this route. Because so many things can come from it. Kings defense could say that his brother did everything, while J.C. (I'm so glad that James is the other killer) lawyer's could say that they had the right person. That could cause so much doubt in a juriors mind that they could both walk. I can't wait to see how they tie this one together.

I can't wait to read more. Congrats on the book, can't wait to read it.

Reviewer: Irish_charm Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Nov 2010 6:48 PM Title: Return of the King

This is just getting better and better. I know it's twisted but I love the fact that the babies DNA matches King's. I wonder if the baby is actually the victums or did they implant a frozen embro into the poor girl after she was kidnapped.

There are so many sick possibilties and I can't wait to see what happens next.

Reviewer: Irish_charm Signed [Report This]
Date: 20 Nov 2010 6:27 PM Title: Return of the King

Ah I like the Jane twist. That girl really is a bitch..... Mike is a real loser going where the money is.

I love this story, it is so different. I love the technical aspects to it. Sorry it has taken me so long to get to it but I am seriously behind on my reading and this is one story that I didn't want to rush through.

Reviewer: J23 Signed [Report This]
Date: 17 Nov 2010 4:19 AM Title: Return of the King

The only thing I can think of so far is that Royce King has an identical twin brother - because how do the tell identical twins apart with DNA? I know of one set of identical twins when they we born 90 days apart because one was born immature. Was one born out of wedlock and adopted while one born on time and kept? I have a cousin whos parents had her out of wedlock and adopted her but then still married? Royce's mother would still have been showing so it does not completely make sense but its hard to come up with theories. Really good story so far.

Reviewer: tinhunny Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 12 Nov 2010 4:20 PM Title: Return of the King

you're a really good writer. i love how you made the characters come alive as agents.

im so looking forward to the next posts.....

Reviewer: troberts Signed [Report This]
Date: 01 Nov 2010 8:15 PM Title: Return of the King

Very interesting investigation but I was most interested in the talk between Edward and Bella. how are they going to be able to wait till this case is over.

Reviewer: biblepam Signed [Report This]
Date: 31 Oct 2010 12:47 AM Title: Return of the King

enjoyable post.. hope the leads they have are credible and that headway is made in the case.. the sooner that's done, the sooner Bella and Edward can go out to that nice restaurant one evening.... loving your story as always.. Pamb.

Reviewer: AKIRA 23 Signed starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 30 Oct 2010 1:44 PM Title: Return of the King

Pease update real soon i am looking ford to reading more

Reviewer: kneon Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 25 Oct 2010 2:10 AM Title: Return of the King

awe that was a sweet ending.  Great new info.  Good luck with your editing.

Reviewer: clanmoran Signed [Report This]
Date: 24 Oct 2010 10:42 PM Title: Return of the King

Nice work!!  Weird to say with this story (which I am TRULY loving BTW!!), but it was "cute" to have them start to get closer :-).

I truly believe you will go far in the writing/publishing world....you are a very good author!  Keep up the good work, and yes I know we have to wait a few weeks for all your stories, and I will TRY to be patient----good thing you can't HEAR me!!! :-)

Reviewer: Noble Korhedron Signed [Report This]
Date: 24 Oct 2010 9:49 PM Title: Return of the King

R&R'ed on FFN, Jen!! :-D

Reviewer: lilquackers Signed [Report This]
Date: 24 Oct 2010 9:15 PM Title: Return of the King

Good chapter really like the details you gave with the letters going out thru the guard.

Reviewer: My Not-So-Secret Obsession Signed [Report This]
Date: 24 Oct 2010 6:43 PM Title: Return of the King

Great job. Please keep writing, i'm need to know what happens=)

Reviewer: anakinsmom Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 24 Oct 2010 5:32 PM Title: Return of the King

GREAT CHAPTER ! Yes, I know I'm shouting. Beautiful job of laying the foundation of facts to build their case on. And the beginnings of a hint of romance between Bella and Edward are really sweet.

Take your time posting the next chapter and focus on your editing task. We'll all be waiting.

Thanks again for all the wonderful stories you send to us!

Reviewer: amandaolsson Signed [Report This]
Date: 18 Oct 2010 3:30 PM Title: Return of the King

great chapter....

Reviewer: amandaolsson Signed [Report This]
Date: 18 Oct 2010 3:21 PM Title: Return of the King

great chapter....

Reviewer: MaryMary Signed [Report This]
Date: 12 Oct 2010 8:58 PM Title: Return of the King

GOOD start, I hope you can keep this up. So many never finish on an intense story.

 

Deep subject matter.

No results found.
You must login (register a new account) to review.